3 Ways to Redefine Success

Are you chasing the wrong kind of success? Our culture is obsessed with it, often defining it by money, power, and recognition.

But surely, there must be more to a truly successful life.

A few years ago, I gave a talk to newly inducted students of the National Honors Society. I reflected on the message they truly needed to hear—one often missing in our society. These were already the highest achievers and hardest-working students on campus. Yet, I saw how many were exhausted, solely focused on stacking their college applications with as many extracurriculars and AP courses as possible.

It seemed many had lost the pure joy of learning and living, and sometimes struggled to be wonderful human beings to their fellow classmates or teachers.

I challenged them to look beyond external accolades and instead, cultivate their inner world—

to live a life rich in well-being, wisdom, giving, and wonder.

Here are a few excerpts from that talk, presenting three powerful ways to redefine success, complete with action items you can try.

Three Ways to live a successful life:

1. Live a Joyful, Loving Life

“I want to challenge you to develop an inner self that is passionate and purposeful, and cultivate a joyful, happy heart. Slow down from all the wonderful things you are doing, and make the time to build a strong relationship and understanding of yourself, your friends, your loved ones and strangers you meet.

What good is it to have all the external success if your inner self is not happy or fulfilled, or if you have not made deep, meaningful, loving relationships?”

Try this: Go and play like you did as a child. This simple act can reconnect you with pure joy. Do one thing each and every day that feels playful and truly lights you up!

2. Build Character

“Ultimate success is not dependent on something outside of you, but what is inside of you. It is not what you have on your college resumes, nor the number of straight A’s that matter, but Who YOU are and what you do for others that matters more than anything else. A moral character is the hardest and most important accomplishment you will ever achieve. Remember to work on your character and your heart just as much as you do your mind. The work you do on your inner life is just as important, if not more important, than the work you do for any external accomplishment.” 

Try this: Take an honest look at one area of your character that needs work- patience, acceptance, motivation–and create an action plan to work on it everyday.

Read a book, find a quote that inspires you, but consciously DO the character virtue everyday even if it is hard or you do not feel like it. Even small, conscious efforts daily will compound over time.

3. Value Your Well Being

I want to challenge you to live a virtuous life that will give you a lifetime of joy, happiness, and fulfillment for yourself and everyone you meet in the world. Can you take time to cultivate well-being, compassion, empathy, love, as much as your desire to achieve? Remember, we are called Human Beings, not Human doings. Can you truly value who you are, and your well-being, as much as what you achieve?

Try this: Create at least 30 minutes a day to cultivate well being and make it as non-negotiable as any work meeting, task, or larger goal you have for the day. See how you feel everyday and how it impacts you. It is a gift you can give yourself.

In a world that is increasingly about achieving and doing more, it is hard to find the space to slow down, connect with yourself and build character. But, when we do, we can live happier lives and be our best selves. To me, that is the most profound success.

Ready to explore these definitions of success for yourself, your team, or your organization? 

Subscribe to my newsletter for more insights, or contact me directly for coaching, speaking, or training opportunities.